Single in Sin City

A good girls survival guide to dating in Las Vegas

Date Gone Bad!!!

Sara,

What do you do when your date totally embarrasses you?  I recently went out with this woman who I met online.  Our first “coffee date” was pretty cool and I thought she was really nice. On our second date we went to dinner at a very nice restaurant. She ordered a salad.  When the  waitress brought it out my date came completely unglued!  She totally freaked out saying this salad doesn’t look the same as the salad she had last time she was there. What was the matter with it!  She gave the waitress a really hard time and demanded to see the manager.  The waitress and the manager were doing everything possible to make her happy, they brought her another salad they gave her a bunch of extra stuff, they apologized profusely but nothing would make her happy she complained during the entire dinner.  In the meantime I was so embarrassed I didn’t know what to do. Her salad looked fine to me, but she was throwing a fit. We finished eating and she took everything she could off the table and put it in her purse.  I was so embarrassed I left the server a 50% tip and we left.

I thought maybe this was just a one-time thing and so we went out again the next week.   We went to another really nice restaurant and she threw another fit!  She had to call in the manager and complain about one of the servers it was so embarrassing I wanted to crawl under the table.  Needless to say I am not calling this woman back and truthfully, I hope I never see her again. 

 What should a guy do when his date is embarrassing him like crazy?

 

Wowsers! I am sorry to say I laughed pretty hard at the imagery of someone stealing everything off the table. I think the question posed to me is, “What do you do in this type of situation?”

Advice: Well honestly Anonymous, I would not go on another date with that person! Also, if a date ever steals things off the table, then you should probably not ask her out again. (just sayin..) Although, I think that is “hindsight is 20/20″ type of advice. My real advice is if you are ever in that type of awkward, bad vibe, geesh this date is cray cray type of scenario again….end it. I literally would say something like this,”I can tell you are having a rough night and this is not my idea of appropriate behaviour. Thank you for meeting me but this is not what I am looking for.” (I promise you I have actually said something along those lines before during a bad date.) You see most people don’t handle things that way so they are shocked by it. If you say it firmly, politely, and in a manner that leaves no room for argument..I guarantee you will catch them off guard enough to make an exit. I left a bad date with his jaw wide open in a similar manner in the middle of dinner. He called me to apologize but really…..you just can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube. (I’m full of useless clichés tonight!) You can choose to not tolerate that type of behavior and tell the bad date that and RUN or…………You can always go the bathroom and not come back. I prefer directness BUT the choice is up to you!

Until Next Time….Ciao!

Advertisements

March 28, 2014 Posted by | First Dates, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

You Probably Shouldn’t Be Dating If….

You probably shouldn’t be dating if you are off the hook crazy! Derr.. Seriously, I believe an important part of dating is being in the correct mindset. If you are searching for romance for the wrong reasons, then you are cooking with a recipe for disaster. I LOVE lists! So here’s a list of reasons why someone SHOULD NOT be dating.

  • You should not be dating if you are on the rebound. (Booooooooy Howdy I get it. I’ve had to voluntarily walk away from someone I loved before because he was no longer good for me. I’ve felt heart ache. The kind of pain that you would do ANYTHING to dull. However, if you are dating on the rebound, you are most likely going to get hurt or hurt the other person. Take the time to heal first. It’s better for you..I promise.)
  • You should not be dating if you are looking to be complete. (I do not believe in this style of dating. If you are not satisfied with yourself, how in the world can you satisfy someone else? I do understand but trust me….there is no white night or secret princess that is going to magically solve your problems. I waited on Superman a long time…trust me on this.)
  • You should not be dating if you NEED love. (Okay before everyone jumps on me…let me explain. I know a girl who was dating someone for two weeks and declared love to someone. She has given him keys, garage door codes…everything. This is a horrible idea. How can anyone possible really love someone in that amount of time? The truth is she is probably going to be devastatingly hurt when all is said and done. She needs to be loved so bad that she latched on to the first decent man she met. Love yourself first. Love yourself and then take the time to know if someone is worthy of your love. We all want to be loved…just be sure you love yourself first.)
  • You should not be dating if your personal life is a mess. (If you are all over the place emotionally, there is no need to be dating. How is that fair to the other person? Get it together first..no it doesn’t need to be perfect but if you are still living with your ex or have kids struggling with major issues that need your full-time attention..ummm maybe work that out first?  We all have problems but the basics need to be together before you endeavor to date.)

AND DRUM ROLL PLEASE

  • You should not be dating if you need to see a Psychiatrist. (I am a big advocate of counseling. Most people could use it. HOWEVER I am going to share the story below. It is a true story. I mean ya can’t make stuff like this up yo!)

A man and woman had a chance encounter in a parking lot at the mall. They hit it off. They went on several dates. On the fourth date their relationship became physical..(Psst: As in they were getting ready to have sex dude.) They began to take off their clothes. Things were getting err steamy. The woman suddenly bursts out in to tears and begins to sob. She confessed that she had been abused by her father. She cried and cried about how her ex husband didn’t really love her. I mean she was hysterical! “Why doesn’t anyone want me?” she exclaimed at the top of her lungs. All my male friend could think about is how quickly he could get out of there as he tried  to console her.  He did not see her again. Bless her heart. She needs to seek therapy post-haste. I am not belittling her issues or her pain but…she shouldn’t be dating.

Advice: Dating is hard enough. The act of opening yourself up and allowing someone to learn more about you is a major feat. Be sure that when you do, you are in the correct mindset.

Until Next Time…Ciao!

December 30, 2013 Posted by | Dating Advice, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

It’s Too Freaking Soon!!

I have a friend that recently called off his engagement. By recently I mean like three months ago. In that time frame he has been rapidly dating. He has been serial dating. I am not judging him for this. Although I do think he is in a dangerous state of mind to be dating, that is his business. What I do think is unhealthy is how fast he has been introducing these women to his daughters.

My friend has two daughters and what we share in common is the fact that they lost their mother in 2012 just like my sons lost their father. If you do not know the pain and struggles involved with trying to fill in a whole you can’t possibly fill for your children, I am very grateful. I would never wish that fate on anyone. On my better days, I just feel inadequate. During a tough day, I am lost and helpless and just try to keep a smile on my face. However….I am derailing. I share this because these kids are in a different spot than most. They have lost something vital in their lives at an age where it is very difficult to cope. The last thing any of them need is to get overly attached. It is for this reason that I am so concerned about him and his awesome daughters.

In the last three weeks, the girls have met four different women. One woman that he has dated more regularly than the others has been spending a LOT of time with them.  The night he told me they all had family dinner and put up the Christmas tree together I felt shocked. I was compelled to say something. I knew it had to be gentle and non condemning.   I planned out what to say carefully. I care about him and his daughters. He has only known this woman for three weeks BUT he may care about her. However, before I could say something, he called me panicked to tell me the woman said she loved him! She loves him in three weeks? REALLLLLLLLLLY?????? “What did you say to her in response,” I queried. “I told her it was way too soon to say that,” he answered.  HOLY BETSY SCHMUCKERS! What is homegirl thinking?

I gently said, “I think you should slow this down. Don’t you think she has been spending a lot of time with the girls and getting really attached?” He replied, “Yes I do.” I asked him, “Why can’t you just date and get to know her? Maybe you should leave the family time out until you’re sure.” He said,”That sounds like a good idea.”  So at least I said something. His life is his to live. I felt much better after at least voicing my concern. I am only concerned because I can relate so well. The girls need a positive female role model in their lives. I get it. I would give almost anything to give my sons a father figure. BUT…I need my kids to see me making good decisions too. I can’t run the risk of them LOSING another father figure. I can’t just go out to the store and buy one. If I could, trust me, I would in a heartbeat. Life doesn’t work that way. Life isn’t very fair-even to kids who deserve better. Those girls deserved a better hand of cards than what was dealt to them BUT they do have a parent that loves them dearly. That’s more than I had.

Moral for today? I’m going to make this short and sweet. If you are a single parent…be careful with who you let into your children’s life. Oh and before I forget….If someone you have been seeing for only three weeks professes to be madly in love with you and it is not love at first sight with you too…run! That’s the kind of obsession that can become dangerous.Kind of cray cray like homegirl below…just sayin! 

obsessive women

Until Next Time…Be careful and Ciao!

 

December 21, 2013 Posted by | Dating Advice, Relationships, Single Parents, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

The “Vegas Woman”

If you’ve never lived here you don’t know. You probably think every woman is a cocktail waitress or stripper and that she lives on the strip. Okay, hopefully you don’t think that but you would be surprised at what some people’s assumptions can be.  The truth is there are regular communities, schools, churches, etc that never get shown in the movies. However, until I became single I never realized the incredibly fast and shallow single dynamic that existed in this city. It’s like this subculture I knew nothing about.

Once I realized that it was so very unfamiliar, I was terrified.  Then…of course…I got over it.  I discovered my competition in this city is a type of female I am no match for. It’s a VEGAS Chic! She is the reason real women have to constantly prove themselves to real men (I said real men.) I love me some lists. Here is a down and dirty (I freaking love that phrase) list of common traits I see in a Vegas woman.

  • When they are in their twenty’s they are fresh still but have implants and are slowly lightening their hair or getting extensions, etc. It’s a process to be hotter and more perfect to obtain a rich dude or compete with the nightlife. They are often still fresh.larissa
  • When they are in their 30’s begin to spend all of their money on designer labels. If they have not hooked a rich guy yet, the self improvements will continue.
  • Single “Las Vegas” women will frequent all of the places where affluent men will be.
  • “Vegas” women will be over extended or use other creative means to maintain the constant upgrading of their bodies as well as to pay for the shiny BMW they drive. They usually earn less money than me but are always driving better cars and rocking better clothes. But hey I love driving an 8-year-old car with a broken window…really I do. heehee
  • The “Las Vegas Woman” will not always be about landing a rich guy. Sometimes, they just get so caught up in the shallowness of the city and the pace of it that they become lost in it.
  • A  “Las Vegas Women” at 40 will look like the ultimate poker player. Botox laden with an expressionless face and the mouth of a blow fish. It’s kind of scary.

blonde botox

  • At the end of their game, a “Las Vegas Woman” will look tired and worn out. They have moved too fast. It catches up. haggard woman

******QUALIFIER***** I am not speaking about EVERY Las Vegas woman. Um hello…I AM a Las Vegas resident AND a woman. I am not referring to every woman who lightens their hair or has surgery. It’s the reason behind the improvements. Most of the women I am referring to are looking for something.  So hey don’t be offended. I am born and raised here. I always knew these women existed. However, being compared to them is a MUTHA. The irony lies in the fact I always thought I would stand out MORE being so real. That is just not usually the case.  What a trippy city I live in! Ah well…be true to yourself peeps.

Until Next Time….Ciao!

September 18, 2013 Posted by | Dating Advice, Las Vegas Tips, Men Advice, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

7 Bad Date Exit Strategies

My only addition would be the following:

  • Men looking to get out of a bad date: Ask the woman if she would like to go back to your place and meet your parents. Mention how your mother still cooks for you and washes your laundry.  If this does not work, ask if she can cover the bill because you forgot your wallet. This will send women running…I promise.

 

  • Women looking to get out of a bad date: Start planning the wedding. Then proceed to talk about all the babies you want to have. You can even have fun with this and start naming them at the table. This has a 99.99% success rate and I have used it personally with success.

Another Single Woman's Blog

We’ve ALL been there. The Bad Date.

Sitting at a table across from your date and wondering how in the hell you’re going to get out of the situation. I’ve compiled a short list of ways to do this. Some require minimal pre-planning and some can be done on the fly. These are options that can be used when you don’t feel like saying to the person’s face:

” You’re a creepy bastard and you look NOTHING like your pictures. There’s no fucking way I want to stay another minute let alone EVER want to have sex with you.”

Most of us wouldn’t have the guts to say that in person so here’s what else you can do:

  1.  Go to the bathroom but don’t come back. This only works if you are seated where your date can’t see the bathroom AND the exit.
  2.  Tell your date you’re going to the…

View original post 345 more words

July 29, 2013 Posted by | First Dates, Uncategorized | , , , , | Leave a comment

Don’t Let Your Crazy Out!

Oh My Oh My..I only took a couple of Psychology classes in college but I had a field day with this. The message below screams “Help Get Me Some Meds” (Oh and I’m not being mean, I’m being serious.) This pearl of a man sent me a message last week about how he was in bed with his two snakes and three dogs. (Yeah I know..I kinda don’t need to say much else-right?) MY FIRST mistake was not blocking him but I don’t really date a lot right now (I’m trying to just get to know one person at a time and follow my own advice..yeah that’s how I roll..boom) so I didn’t bother. Tonight this homeboy let his crazy out! crazyman-01

I wonder how u make so much money 
U may have to work ure ass off for that? I come from the other side….I try mostly just to serve only myself…it offends me to serve other people….I used to work at Kentucky fried chicken as a dishwasher…..it was a good job I enjoyed some of it allot… 
It kept me in good shape working there…..but sometimes id get customers that would annoy me sometimes even spooky ones 
So ive become a bum who just stays at home….I try to listen to noone…..but it has started to work against my best wishes…. 
I used to love having all the time in the world…. 
But I have lost control of my mind….so its not the same anymore 
Im getting old and senile…..I value my family and my animals who r very close to me…..my mind is broken…it doesnt work like it used to….I dont know why u wont write me…..maybe u thought I am a psychotic asshole piece of shit….. 
I didnt mean to make u feel that way 
I dont take this site dead serious all the time…. 
I spend so much time alone…its hard for me to see these date sites as nothing much more than a self entertainment 
if u rnt a lonely kind of person…u may not understand how that can be like……I can even be lonely with allot of people around because sometimes I dont feel connected to anyone

I won’t even begin to address the spelling errors. (Horrible grammar bugs the hell outta me-just sayin) However, I’m sorry Mister-I really am. I do know what it feels like to be lonely. I feel that way often. However, I DON’T know….how it feels to be crazy. (At least I don’t think I do!) So my lesson to you today folks is: Beware of the crazies online pretty effin’ obvious right? Oh and to my crazy friends: Hide your crazy-don’t let it out like this to strangers. (It may get you in trouble.) 

Until next time.. Ciao

February 20, 2013 Posted by | Online Dating, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

YOU DID WHAT???? (what woman know they shouldn’t do but still do)

Image

I could write about this forever. If it isn’t something I did, it is something a friend did while dating or while in love. Sometimes certain men just bring out the crazy in a woman. If you are a man and reading this, I don’t know why. I really don’t. All I know is that I am a fairly intelligent woman that has managed to embarrass myself on several occasions. (I have even been in the act of doing it and had the rational part of my brain tell me to stop and ignored it.) If it’s any consolation, it usually takes a special man to make us nuts. I mean I don’t behave like a mental case for just anyone!

For the ladies I have created a list of what we really should never do – NO MATTER WHAT. I plan on adding to it as time passes.

  • Sit out front of a guy’s house.  I am innocent of this one! but I know some friends that are not. Ladies, please respect yourself more than this. He aint worth it.
  • Cyber stalk your boyfriend. I am hanging my head in shame because I have cyber stalked, cyber snooped and cyber investigated PS: You never enjoy what you find….so stop 🙂
  • Get upset at some guy you’re dating and send him a long, crazy text or message saying goodbye. Guilty again. I do not know why I think it will make me feel better. I actually feel better when I manage to just ignore the dude. It only makes us look like we care more than them and if we invest that much time we probably do. When men stop being interested, they just disappear. So why should we be different?
  • Name calling – I am not much of a name caller myself but have been known to throw a sharp word around with the best of them. Think about it: Showing your pain by acting childish is never ideal.
  • Do not throw things while in an argument. I have outgrown this move. I confess that for the first 5 years of my marriage, I threw ash trays, candy dishes, a soda can (that one was kinda funny.) What can I say?…but I’m sorry
  • Dump the same guy over and over. I see this happen a lot. I have been guilty of it in the past and I warn you: No matter how cute you are, the guy will get tired of it. No one wants to feel like a dumping ground.

December 5, 2012 Posted by | Mistakes, Women Advice | , , , | 14 Comments